I have the bias of feeling like INFPs are on a higher plane. I won't deny it - if there are different planes, ours fly near the top :) That makes it all the more baffling to me that people who share my personality type exhibit (IMO) the same, frequent poor choices in relationships other types make. At the same time, it makes me feel like my idea of a relationship is abnormal.

First of all, I've noticed that some deep people don't seem to care very much about talking in relationships.

What's the point? I think of relationships as accomplishing something together, maybe in part because I seem unable to accomplish much on my own, and because to do something good for the world is everything to me. If there's little talking, then people wouldn't seem to be contributing to each other's accomplishments.

I hope that someone with a semblance of my personality wouldn't be going for relationships just for sex and other "fun" - getting drunk, for example. I hope I'm not the only person who has never gone out of his way for that kind of fun. There are activities I enjoy with other people, that I hesitate to do without a partner, but I don't miss them so much as to want "someone" just for the sake of activities.

There are INFPs who crave "security" from relationships, maybe to feel like part of a family (poor relations with family of origin), to build a family, maybe even from fear of being alone for just short lengths of time. It's appealing to part of me. But I doubt that many would go for just that. The heart has to be into it.

Could it be easier to introvert (used as a verb) and not miss conversation because it risks criticism and conflict? As likely as I would be to busy myself with my own mission, I think I would feel bored and very lonely if I were with someone and not having deep conversations.

Explain it all to me, please.